Final Declaration on Observable Things

All my jokes fall flat here. It can be 90 degrees with 85% humidity at ten in the morning, and while the driver is loading the bags I'll make a comment like, "Cold out this morning," only to have it met with a response like, "Yes, sir, very good." Maybe it's the language barrier. Fortunately Karen's usually on hand with some encouragement: "That went over well."

Luckily there are other sources of humor. Delhi has, as far as I could tell, two traffic lights. One is broken and everyone ignores the other. Kind of like the overhead pedestrian walkways in Mumbai--they're there, but everyone seems to prefer dodging the traffic instead. Traffic condition signs are also amusing: "No rash, no risk," advises one, while another simply states, "Not the way."

Excursions are also fun. To get to the ancient caves on Elephanta Island off Mumbai, one has to pay the ferry, then buy a ride on the ferry-to-park entrance train, then pay to enter the park, which is 120 steps lined with souvenir hawkers, then pay admission to the caves. Guidebooks are extra. Fortunately, and somewhat surprisingly, there is no exit fee.

Finally, watch out for the cow shit. It's slippery, as I discovered in Udaipur. This, at least, was amusing to my Indian audience. But as they say, tragedy is when I cut my finger; comedy is when you fall into an open manhole and die.